Recapping the 4th

I took a few days off...but I'm back in the ergonomically correct computer desk saddle again.
The Fourth of July was a blast. I decorated the entry table, and the front yard (see pictures). Just a light touch compared to last year when we had a huge brunch and even the chandeliers got festive!

Bernie, Jeff and I blew up stuff twice-a "test run" on Friday night, and then Armageddon on the actual day. My hardest laugh of the year is always delivered courtesy of late teen males chasing each other through a vacant field firing roman candles at each other. This year a guy slipped and fell, his friend raced up and shot him as he lay. Hilarious!

Later I had a rocket zoom by just inches from my nose, the orange color and zinging sound was so invigorating! I jumped pretty far for a middle age gal. I truly feel sorry for people who haven't experience such unbridled and irresponsible firework mayhem. It is absolutely the best!

The Kingwood parade (which comes after the kid's fishing derby and bike decorating contest) is perfect. Home grown floats. One entry was the Kingwood "All-Girl Family Association" float, a flat bed truck done up in pink balloons and little girls in pink tee shirts, hair in a pony tail and BIG hair bows, and a huge sign reading "Daddy's Girl". Awww...cute!

Every car or float was tossing something; water bottles, candy, even frisbees. And then one truck came by and was tossing out rainbow striped popsicles. The little guy in front of us got one. He gleefully showed his mom, and then stuck it into his "goodie" bag, and went right back to viewing the parade, mindful that more goodies might be tossed at any second.

I had to laugh as his mom told him that he did need to eat that treat *right now*, as it would melt! See him in the next picture. Isn't he cute? And don't you just love the little patriotic hair bows on the girls?
Yes, life as it should be in America, right here deep in the heart of Texas!
Make plans NOW to come visit us next year! Yee haw!

You...and you. Part 2

Ever read Ellen Goodman? She is a columnist for the Boston Globe, and on July 2, her editorial was entitled "If you're 'outsourcing' friendship, you're not alone"

Apparently she and I had the same "mull" this past week: The Duke University study entitled Social Isolation in America.

That was the study I blogged about last week, the one that noted that most people now have only two people in their lives with whom they discuss important matters.

In it she decried those who have outsourced their "friendship" (those with whom important things are discussed) to "professional therapist, and, gawd help us, talk shows".

She also noted, as did I, that technology has changed the way we used relationship time. And that people are increasingly both in-touch and isolated.

Goodman observed:

"It's become easier to keep extensive relationships over time and distance but harder to build the deep ones in our back yard. In the virtual neighborhood, how many have substituted e-mails for intimacy, contacts for confidants and Face-book for face to face?"

The truth as I see it is that drop by/over the fence relationships are rare (although I DO have a lovely neighbor family who do actually drop by with their too-cute-for-words year old son.) Most people that I know would very seriously hesitate to just "drop by" to discuss/explore what is on their mind, for fear of throwing a wrench into a presumed tightly compressed daily agenda.
Most will no longer make a phone call either. If they do call, and actually get someone, they often apologize for calling, saying they meant only to leave a message.

There are those who will routinely drop an email with cute animal pictures, pretty thoughts, or earnest warnings of dire scenario, with nary more than a four word intro such as:

"This is really funny!"

A few other people attempt to keep the warmth of friendship at a pleasant glow via emails and cards with this level of intimacy:

"How r you? We r fine. The weather is hot. We went to my cousin's baby's b-day party. They had cake and ice cream. We are really busy, so I'd better go".

(Reading such missives puts me into a time warp, sending me back to elementary school letter writing units, reliving memories of struggling to end the letter. Is it "sincerly" or is it "sincerely" or "your's truely/truly? A ticklish problem, thank Word for spell check.)

The fact that such notes are sent at all keeps us in a finger touch of relationship.

Delightfully, a few friends are able to express themselves brilliantly in writing. I experience the fervor of their joys, the anguish of their trials, and the haunting heaviness of their relational or career enigmas. It is a joy to read their considered thoughts as an electronic elixir which is splashed before me only after they have refined the mix of phases, words, spacing, and font, in order to convey that which they have edited, rethought, and now wish to entrusted to me.

They write fully, and deeply. And mercifully, by expressing themselves electronically, they do not have to regroup against blurted comments or unguarded facial expression from me. Written response are more thoughtful, as an outcome of allowing the time for choice words and phrases to form. It may be minutes, or hours, or a day or two before the right words are sent back. But the words and phrases, and the friendship is often much richer than could or would expressed comfortably face to face.

I will be e-mailing Goodman about her suggestion that email is a substitute for intimacy. Email is what you make it. The level of intimacy always floats with the level of communication. If the ability to discuss important matters is the definition of intimacy, then shouldn't it be the communication, and not the media, that counts?

More baby bird pictures

I can't resist...is that a Jewish bird with a kippa?












Look at the size of those feet!





The hair drier was to dry off the babies, they had washed down a storm drain. Jeff used a tire iron to crowbar the drain cover off and rescue the babies.

Hero of the baby quail

Just a quick post: Jeff has lots of quail near his home, and these baby quails fell out of their nest. He rescued them from the ground, and called a rescue organization who will be caring for them in an appropriate fashion.

I love how cute their feet are, and that they all ready have their top notch, like a little hat.

How about that: A feathery bird with a hat, instead of a hat with a bird feather~sweet!

Reaction: You...and you.

"Americans, who shocked pollsters in 1985 when they said they had only three close friends, today say they have just two."

This from the June 2006 issue of American Sociological Review.

(Literary aside: I am aware that as a citation, that deserves to have a big red "F" scratched across it...since it doesn't include vol., pg, author, ed. etc.
PLEASE DON'T TELL ANYONE I CITED LIKE THAT! If you really want to know, I will look it up later and I will cite in the format of your choice: AP, MLS, Bluebook, or that gawdawful Turabian. A pox on the Houston Chronicle for not providing proper citation format in the first place!)

Where were we?

Oh yeah.

A study at Duke entitled "Social Isolation in America" was defining a "close" friend as being someone with whom you could discuss important matters.

The study's author admitted there was some confusion on the part of those surveyed as to whether or not email friends count as close friends. Email provided a new slant since 1985: Do you count as a friend for the purposes of this study those people with whom you chat via email several times a day, or IM, or blog with, but live miles apart in terms of physical location.

(For the painfully young: Those electronic options didn't exist back then. We oldies actually remember back that far!)

But letters did exist back then. Letters used to fly around the world, to pen pals, service people, missionaries, and students. People fell in love with letters. People developed world changing opinions via letters. Adams and Jefferson come to mind, this being close to July 4th and all.

Why didn't anyone back then ask if letter friendships counted?

The study was looking at the question in terms of social networks to meet emergency needs. The Katrina evacuees had friends to help them get out. Those who got left behind usually had little or no social network. A email buddy, it was suggested, may not be able to come get you when your car goes kaput, or bring you some meds from the store when you are down with a fever. Or be able take you in when a hurricane/fire/earthquake/flood/boils/frogs is/are about to destroy your city.

I actually do have lots of friends with whom I feel comfortable discussing important matters. Outside of family, who I also count as friends, I have three friends in San Diego, two in Denver area, one in Portland, one in Orlando, a cluster in Houston (most of whom look great in hats; see picture above of that lot), and even one in far off Switzerland.

I wouldn't necessarily discuss all my "important" matters with every friend. I like Mark Twain's quote: "Everyone is ignorant, just on different subjects".
(Another inadequate citation. Sorry.)

Maybe everyone can be a friend, just on different subjects?

Didn't it used to be that everyone would stop and help you if your car went kaput, and your neighbor would "know" if you needed some chicken soup to get better? Yet those same helpers were rarely treated to the kinds of private musings and navel gazing angst that often fuels modern friendship. They delivered the goods, and were gone. They were dependable, if not intimate.

The above mentioned article has been in my mental ponder fodder file for seven days now. I felt it was time to let the partially digested thought food leak from my mind and out my finger tip and on down the line electronically to you.

By discussing something important together, we become, as defined by the study, "friends".

As they say in class:

Discuss.

Modest chandelier chains, talking condiments, and son to visit

Being a milliner is a lot more fun than being a maid. But it is time to catch up on the usual housework. Our son is coming for the 4th of July weekend, so I thought I'd better get busy and dust the chandeliers.

If you have a son, and you have just read that last sentence without laughing, then your son must be one strange dude. My son wouldn't notice dust on a chandelier unless there was money attached to the dust!

I just happened to look up at my chandelier and was admiring my neatly covered chandelier chain and thought:

"I really should share my money saving decorating tip".

So here it is:

Don't spend $30-$40 for a chandelier chain cover.

(The need for such a cover was suggested to me by a professional interior designer, whose services I won in a raffle~I'd think twice before trying to win such free consultations in the future...after a designer visits you, you view your whole home with a sense of failure that only remedy is blowing your entire savings account).

Instead, use a roll of wired edged ribbon from your craft stash, and ta-da, by wrapping the ribbon around the chain, you now have clothed the naked. No longer will you avert your eyes from those brazen naked chains when, for a mere dollar or two worth of ribbons by the spool, modesty and cutting edge decore can easily be achieved!

I was feeling a bit blue after dropping B. off at the airport, sort of lonely for some reason. Wished I had some friend nearby to stop and visit. Decided to get breakfast at Taco Bell.

And see the picture...who knew condiments were such interesting conversationalist? As long as I like burrito supremes, I will never be lonely again.
Next time I will be sure to get the Hot and Spicy packets.
I hope they will not be too forward.
Judging from my chandeliers, you should know how modest I am...

Visiting son Jeff is still single, a fine Christian man, in business in SLC. He has a lovely girlfriend, but if he doesn't get married before he hits thirty I will be auctioning him off on ebay. Four years to go.....

Millinery: A hat to go with a suit

This is a buckram framed hat. Buckram is a material that looks like stiff window screen, and it looks like the screen was coated with paint. I cut out a piece of buckram to make the shape of the top (tip) of the hat, another piece to make the sides, and another to make the brim. I actually used two pieces ironed together in layers to make the brim extra stiff.
Then I stitched millinery wire to each part. Millinery wire looks like regular wire covered with thread. Then I covered the wire with French Elastic, or bias. It looks like one inch wide gauze, but it is stiff. I stitched the bias so it encased the wire. Then I stitched all the pieces of the hat together, through the bias. Then I covered each piece with fabric. In this case, I used a white polyester satin, using the wrong side so it would look like crepe. All together, this hat took me about 15 hours to make: that includes shopping for fabric and ribbons, making the flowers, cutting out fabric and buckram, wiring, lining, putting in a sweat band.
I learned a lot about attaching a brim to buckram. I had done that before, but this time I was a lot more confident.
It was fun to try to make a hat to co-ordinate with a suit. I'll see if I can get Gayle to model her new chapeaux before she takes it home! She's a great customer, and a lovely friend.

PS: Finding the zebra stripped ribbon to match the suit's cuff and border was such great serendipity!
 

Learning technology: Techie me? Not!

I'm still learning what can be done with my digital camera, Picasa, and Blogspot. I'm trying for a collage shot of the hat I just finished.

(To see the hat a little better, click on the pictures, and mouse over the picture on the next screen. It gets a little bigger). I think I will need to post three separate pictures though.

June 26, 2006: Stuff you might not know.

Did you know...

~You can make the photos on the blog much bigger by simply clicking on them? They will show up in a separate window, and you will have a "print" or "email" option for that picture available at that point too.

~You can also email any of the blogs to anyone you want to! Just click on the little envelope at the end of each blog and it will send the blog off to whoever you wish to share it with.
Easy-peasy! (That is my new favorite expression!)

(Feel free to blast them to your whole email address book! Imagine how many of your friends, even now, are desperately wishing someone, anyone, would send them a picture of a gecko, or a fine cocktail hat! YOU could be the person to help them realize that dream!)

~You can also leave a comment: It just takes a moment to create an account (it is free) and then you can add your two cents/praise/dismay or whatever after each blog. Your comment is emailed to me, and then I get to "allow" or not allow the comment to be posted.
Added bonus: you will then be signed up to make a blog for yourself any time you want. Knowing my readership, my mind just reels with the array of blog topics that this simple act could enable.

~The blog page shows my last 10 blogs on the side of the page.
But actually, ALL of them are still there. Going back to June 1, 2006.
If you click on the bottom archived title (usually mine either say Millinery or a date), then that blog will open and to its side will be ten more going back. If you are new reader, June 1 is my introduction page, and June 2 is my all time favorite so far.

~Top bloggers, those people who have lots and lots of people who read their blogs sometimes get contacted by publishing houses to have their blogs made into books.
(I'm rooting for "Dressaday" to become a book, she is a riot! and is in the top 10 of all blogs!).
If that ever happens to me, I will be sure to acknowledge each and everyone of my naggy "you should write a book" friends in the book.
But if you don't keep up with my blog, you won't be on the list.
At all.
So there.

And remember to cheer for my dear OSU Beavers to win college baseball tonight!

Millinery: Black Hats

The first hat (viewed from the side): The hat that started it all! It was purchased from Fleur de Paris http://www.fleurdeparis.net in New Orleans. A signed Nicole LeBlanc design, I was lucky enough to meet her and view her work shop later on. Feathers, ribbons, flowers, a curving brim and a whopping price tag, it had it all. It seemed like such an enormous statement that at first B. hesitated to have me wear it to events, imagining that it was just too much.

He got over that.

Waaaaaayyyyy over that.

He now considers it one of my more discreet chapeauxs.
It is the only hat I have ever worn to a funeral. Or actually, a memorial service. I was in need of a deep brim to shield my teary face. I began to understand why for centuries women have worn veils to funerals and other emotional occasions: No one really looks great when overcome with emotion to the degree that tears and mucus and blotchy spots festoon one's face.
Jackie Kennedy was so right to shield her face in that deep veil.

This, by contrast, is a black hat that would simply never work at a funeral...indeed, it is what is known as a cocktail hat. Cocktail hats perch jauntily on the crown of one's head, perhaps tipped a bit over one eye, and look as wispy as a passing flitation.
Certainly not correct for a funeral event.
I made this hat, and have enjoyed wearing it to several evening events.
The third hat was an ebay purchase. It really doesn't work on me, but many twenty something girls have modeled it with great saucy style.
People are funny: Children especially so. How many times have I shown a child, somewhere between 8 and 18, these black hats and had them inform me that these hats are "perfect" to wear to a funeral. And alarmingly, how many seemingly estute adults have instructed me with the same degree of brevity, that these black hats would "look really great" for a funeral.
Now I wonder if when I was wearing my Little Black Dress with my cocktail hat at a cocktail party, if everyone imagined I had just come from a sad event, and hadn't time to change.
I didn't wear a hat at all to the last memorial service I attended. Just a long sleeved black silk dress. But I couldn't help notice a twenty-something "Miss" wearing a T- shirt with sequines and flip flops, and other Young Thing in a clinging dress cut "down to here and up to there" in a style that suggested amorous encounters with strangers, for her, was a common occurance.
I wonder what they would have said if I had shown them a black hat?

June 21, 2006: Geckos and Travelers and Surgery...oh my!

The first day of summer zipped by without acknowledgement here at Jill's World. I have a good excuse: B. had surgery that day.
A Transureathral Resection of Prostate.
AKA: a "TURP".

Google it for all the details!

RN daughter Laura assured us it was "not a big deal...just really uncomfortable for the first day, then it gets better".

She herself had previously chosen to spend the first day of summer traveling to SF, and on to Boston, with an old friend. Goal: To continue checking off states she has visited. I believe she is closing in on 50.

I figured it was not going to be too bad. And it actually wasn't, unless you count the part where the Doctor forgot to write orders for a med pump, leaving B. fresh out of surgery with nothing more than two Vicodine tablets to relieve pain. The Doctor had finished the surgery and headed out for a two hour lunch, while B. sweated and gritted his teeth in pain.
Pain IS optional. That is why during the pre-op appointment B. went over the fact that he wanted a med pump, to self deliver pain killers every ten minutes, instead of having tablets, which would show up when the nurse had the time. Tablets are what you take if you want the pain option. Med pump is what you want if you wish to opt OUT of the pain.

Several of us in the family have had enough surgery to know what it is like waiting in pain for a tablet, and waiting another 30 minutes for the tablet to take effect. It is NOT the way to manage pain.
The doctor readily agreed to a med pump.

Grrrrr....... Doctors: They readeth not, neither do they write, apparently.

This doctor, who we actually like, later passed blame: oh the nurses didn't get it right.
Since I stood with the nurse as she called to pharmacy to try to get the "promised" meds, I happen to know it wasn't the nurse's fault.
Plus I happen to know ****for a fact*** that nurses are not allowed to write prescriptions.
Only doctors can do that.
Then he blamed pharmacy for taking so long.
Yeah, they did take another two hours once the prescription was written. B. had almost five hours of pain with nothing more than what I am usually given for dental surgery, and I am much smaller than B.

I repeat:
Doctors: They readeth not, neither do they write.

Speaking of dentist: My last visit to a dentist (one that I really, really like), the dentist shot meds into me that caused a reaction. Since I have told him of the effects epinephrine has on me (I shake, cry, my slow heart quadruples in rate, and I am wasted the rest of the day), he usually is excellent at working quickly on me to complete the work before I loose numbness.

This last visit, he shot "epi" into me as we were chatting, and I felt it hit. I immediately said "did you give me epi?" and started the meltdown. And he felt so bad. Apologized profusely.

But also said I should have reminded him.
Really!
OK then. I surely will remind him next time. Or is that "surly" will?

I imagine saying next visit:
"Doc. R., I know that this fact is in my chart, but since I am now aware that you are a functional illiterate, and are either unable or unwilling to READ my chart, (causing me to presume that using "Books on Tape" can now lead to a doctorate of dentistry) , I just want to remind you: NO EPINEPHRINE!"

Or words to that effect...

B. had two nights at the hospital. We watched a massive storm come in from the room on the fifth floor, quite a view. And I stayed with him, to help, and I stitched. See "In the Pink" below.

B. is home now, and just a bit sore. Tiggie is with him, and in classic cat psychic fashion, has gently layed his paw on B.'s lower abdomen several times, and looked at B. with questioning eyes as only a cat can do.

The gecko? He and his friends are now hanging out on the walls of our front porch at night, eating bugs, and reminding us that summer has truly arrived.

Millinery: In the Pink

Two full days of stitching. First time I've made fuschias and this style of rose.
My left arm got sore from the work!
I just got a "hankering" (a word I heard an old Texan use today) to work in pink. The vintage glass berries were found in Rice Village Universal Fabric store. They are like the berries on one of the hats my Mom wore when I growing up...I loved the quiet jingle sound the berries used to make. I still have a way to go, plus block a straw hat. Must decide color before I order the blank hat body~pink, rose, berry, ice?
And make more filler leaves and stuff.

Millinery: A perfect yellow hat

Daphne style hat, yellow linen. Created for Gayle, to coordinate with the outfit shown on her.

Millinery: Collaboration

This is the piece Gayle and I collaborated on while listening to music, talking and watching the rain.
It is about six inches in diameter.
 

June 20, 2006: All puppies and popsicles here!

I am so glad to have my computer back. That old human need hierarchy of food, shelter, sex, well, add an internet connection to my needs.

Or as Bernie put it: "Are you a little cranky because of internet withdrawal?"

A little???? No, a lot!

So, I am much happier now!

To catch up on stuff: Yeah, Houston got clocked, and will probably get some more rain today. The dry stream bed in the garden is puddled, and the sun is streaming through the trees, making the garden look rather magical. It is sunny out, which I am told will cause more rain later... blah blah blah....Locals on the 8's.

I wonder how many people know what that expression means?

I've watched enough meteorology since coming to Texas that I should have course work credit just from listening to Dr. Greg Forbes.

I stayed up till almost 3 AM last night, because I was having so much fun with Picasa. It is a Google based program that lets me edit, enhance and organize my pictures, and make folders and slideshows. I wish I could put my all cat slide show here. And my millinery slide show. There may be a way to do that...I am still learning,

The Great News is that my friend said her doctor agreed with Laura...the cancer is small, and they are not even sure what exactly it is, but will just watch it for 3 months. PTL! My friend thinks Laura should just get the PHD after her name for this. It is ~lovely~ having someone in the family who knows the inside story on medical stuff!

I was supposed to go to Dallas last weekend to see a woman's hat collection. She collects from mid 1800 to early 1900's and was to show us (Houston Hat Net and Dallas Hat Band) her private collection at a tea.

But, on Saturday morning, hail and sever storms threatened.

So Gayle and I hunkered down and made millinery trim, and listened to Messianic music while it rained. Is there anything nicer than a day with a friend when your plans got cancelled, so you aren't scheduled to do anything at all???? Like an oasis in the rush of life. See the pictures in the next entry above.

Two interesting discoveries:

1: Another blog has published a picture of my Midnight Sun hat! Wow. How random is that!

2. And I am loving this blog: http://www.dressaday.com/dressaday.html

I am laughing out loud at her writing and loving her collection of dresses. She publishes a dress every day, usually from the 1950's. I stole her line from today:

"Oh, it's not all puppies and popsicles here at A Dress A Day headquarters. Not everything that rolls off the assembly line gets worn, or even looked at without a shudder".

This, with a photo of a really awful attempt at a dress, a sewing calamity.

I hope someone make a real book out of her blog!

Millinery: Sarah Beth

The hat I designed under the inspiration of my friend Apple's daughter's nuptuals.

I want to redo the hat frame, but I love the flowers!

A few more flowers, in a brooch

Millinery: Rainy Day and Flowers

A quick post: Houston is flooded, B. called me from Chicago to let me know this! All is fine in Kingwood.

The hat pictured is again using the Daphne pattern, and the three minute rose...

And hurray...I'm back on MY computer, but only for a minute before I head for work!