Saturday, October 18, 2008

Friday's Adventure: Getting a Utah Drivers License

Good Citizen Bernie has already gone and gotten his State of Utah drivers license, and he has urged me to get on the stick and take care of doing so for myself. If I want to vote here, I need to change my official residence, and getting a new driver's license will be necessary.

The trouble is...I happen to like the picture on my Texas driver's licenses. Of course that picture was taken ten years ago, before I went through all that hideous work that was involved in getting a Master's degree, and the "change of life", becoming 50, and a host of other environmental hardships due to global warming and the UN.

(Everyone else blames global warming and the UN for everything bad, why shouldn't I?)

My Grandmother once said that any picture of oneself will eventually start looking pretty darn good, given enough years. Boy was she ever right.

Well, what must be done, must be done. There was no time like the present to get on with this project.

B. printed me out a map, telling me that yes, the Department of Motor Vehicles actually is right on the Utah State Fair Grounds.

I was very suspicious of this...and drove right by this entrance:

Seriously...does that look like where you should go to get a driver's licence?
Plus they had NO street signs that said "Motor Ave." anywhere!
Eventually I circled back and drove in, rather annoyed at this point, and found this building in the middle of basically a huge parking lot.

All righty then...this must be the place.

Now this was on Friday, my day off from work, and I was not really in the mood to put on make up and do anything with my hair. Thank heaven my well worn brain managed to remind me that not only would I be taking a test (an open book test Bernie informed me) but I would be having my picture taken.

The picture that I would be flashing multiple times over the next decade or so.

Hmmmph. Rats, I should have headed to the department store for a free make over before I came here.

So I sat in the car for awhile, trying to decide if more blusher would help, and more eye liners, or did it just make me look like I had had too much wine, and was trying for an early Halloween horror look.

Knowing that the best way to prepare for a picture is to take several test shots, I decided I would get going on that.

The usual "heading to prison soon" mug shot look.

The "I didn't think you were going to shoot NOW...." look.

The "Prozac is working well today" look.

The "I don't believe you are old enough to ask me those kinds of questions...does your mother know where you are?" look.

The "I've waited here for two hours, just take the dang picture wouldja?" look.

And I decided this was the right expression. I practiced it a few times, and then got out of my car to go take the test.

As I walked up the steps to the building I saw a sign on the door.

Oh NOW I remember...the State of Utah has an official four day work week, just like me!

Apparently I wasn't the only one who had forgotten this little detail.

A steady stream of cars had pulled up, and parked, and then driven off.

All this fuss and bother for nothing!

Well, there is always next Thursday, my half work day.

This time I think I will have my hair professionally done and have my make up done as well. what other time will my picture be so important?

Oh I know it sounds a little crazy. Sort of like Norma Desmond.

Can't you just hear it now...

State of Utah...I'm ready for my close up now!


Lovella said...

Oh Jill, I love it. . I couldn't agree with your mother more. . it's so funny how I hated pictures of me in our younger years and now they suddenly looks so wonderful. The last years have been harsh on my face. . I am shocked sometimes when I look in the mirror.
HOwever, the last shot of you looked just wonderful. Did we not all just tell you that Utah life must be agreeing with you and Bernie? YOu don't need the makeover, you already look great.
Oh . .I did feel a bit suspicious that they were closed when I saw the building with no cars parked in front. . so sorry you have to do it all over again.

Sara said...

A DMV in the middle of the fair grounds? Is this one of those "only in Utah" things?

Hey, anyway, now you know right where it is, for next Thursday. That gives you more time to practice posing, although I agree with Lovella - that last one is excellent. I think I should have done some pose practicing when I renewed my license last year..I truly look like I might harm somebody. Maybe one day I'll post it on my blog and scare everybody!

Of course, now we will all want to see what the outcome is when you have your DMV portrait taken...

Janitha said...

I agree, you don't need a makeover. You look fantastic! Please tell Tiggie thank you for the card....

Vicki said...

Oh, how funny! I thought I was the only person who practiced "mug" shots! My TX license looked pretty good compared to my FL one, but now ten years later, my FL one looks really good compared to what I look like now! I still remember renewing my KY one on my birthday. A friend (male) was also there that day for his renewal. KY wouldn't allow us to reuse the same photo. He and I sat and waited for our licenses together. The clerk came out, handed him his and then held mine out upside-down and said, "C'mon, honey, let's go try again." I thought I would die of embarrassment...and the second attempt wasn't any better. She wouldn't try for number three. My friend just stared and was too kind to ask to see the photo. Of course, he couldn't wait to tell his wife all about it!

Running wildly said...

Ok....I"m laughing and laughing. I so loved this post. The mug shots are totally priceless. For what it's worth, I think you are stunning.

Ladygrande (Texas Marie) said...

Personally, Jill, I loved your Prozac pose...

Judy said...

Too funny! I'm with your mom...the old pic's look great from this vantage point.

You would have made a great picture on Friday...hope next Thursday's turns out every bit as good.

Islandsparrow said...

You are hilarious! Thanks for making me laugh.

Sorry that you made the trip for nothing but at least you're all practised up smiling.

Virginia said...

Ahh... the joys of MUG SHOTS! I lost my Texas Driver's license and thought I could just go and get the old one put back on a new license. Ack! They stood me up to the wall and shot me anyway. I look swollen (it was first thing in the morning) and my eyes are at half-mast (I hadn't slept wondering what my lost license was doing). Not a good time. I am now praying for someone to steal this one so I can do this again.

Dumb idea, but better than the shot that has nothing to do with me.

I loved you post. It was perfect.


Anonymous said...

You are too funny! Good luck on Thursday. Lori T

Becky said...

Too funny! You have a quirky sense of humour that is quickly appreciated by all of us who are feeling the effects of global warming and the UN (hey, thanks for the heads up on who to blame! Makes sense to me.) :) Now to read Thursday or Friday's blog ~ will you go out of your way to get the "make-over"? or will you stay true to yourself, and have the picture taken as is? Hmm... suspense in blogland.

ru4real @ Healthy Living said...

Funny! Seriously Funny! That mugshot practice session was a riot!

Maureen said...

It would be nice if Texas do the same as Utah's official four days a week.